Thank You to My FSM Family!

Hey TB,  Doing pretty well considering.  Going through another trying time.  Paperwork is starting to go through for the transfer down here to Tampa and the kids are feeling it.  They are hanging in there and will do fine.  I think once all the moving is finished nad we are in a house again it will get better.

Thanks for checking in and for the awesome advice! 

Bobby

Hey , Bobby ;

  Just checking on you , there. I hope you are doing all right .Based on your last post , you are . I always tell folks , if some such thing happens , keep going there and hearing those comments . it makes us stronger .

   How are the Children ? I do hope they haven't changed . Loneliness is paramount because Mom was a big part of their everyday life . You were out Earning and she was in Nurturing . Be there for them as I said , and if you hear a whisper , that's hearts talking .   DOC-- Tanker - Builder

Hey TB.  Thanks!

Funny thing....I went bqack to Vermont, just for the weekend to staqrt getting things ready for the movers, and had an odd experience.  Similar to yours!  I was in the house, I went by myself, the kids stayed in Florida, and I was looking for something downstairs.  I thought I heard someone whispering!  I closed my eyes to try and hear it.....my hearing is not what it used to be.  I couldn't make it out, but it was not just a noise, it was words.  So, yeah, they watch over us.  She knows I need all the help I can get! 

Thanks again TB!

Bobby

Bobby;

   Just checking in my friend .How goes it ? I was thinking about you and the children the other day when I stumbled across a photo of my first wife and the children . Oh , how time does change things .

     I though about you because I had a weird experience over this past weekend . I was at our local park in an old gazebo they have by the lake shore .I could've sworn I heard Both wives voices conversing behind me .Turned around -No one there .They do watch out for us and we sometimes , Well mostly , never know .

 Now that said a, a friend who is a shrink said it was because my heart was heavy and My mind was working overtime to let me hear that inside , way down deep .You know  what she told me . It was rare for most men to realize the depth of their love until that person was no longer in our lives , because of passing over .

 By the way , passing away sounds so final . I prefer passing over . Cause I know someday I'll see them again .    Tanker - Builder

BK, thank you so much!  You are so right about the folks here.  A stellar group of people! 

Eagle90

Eagle, the support you feel is well deserved. That is why I chose to be here. This bunch of folks is incredible in every way. Know that we all have your back as we all walk this road of life. Build on my friend.

BK

This is interesting. My message notification was not highlighted in red but had your pm with your email address along with my other messages. Sounds like another hiccup in the system. Email inbound.

Eagle90

Hey PJ.  No sir.  Have not received any PM's from you.  I'm sending you one.

 

Bobby

 

Aparently you are not receiving my PMs and I'm not receiving yours. The same thing hapenned with another member recently. Must be this new and improved  format.

Hey PJ.  No sir.  Have not received any PM's from you.  I'm sending you one.

Bobby

Bobby

Have you received the two P Ms  I sent you?

Hey John!  Glad to see you back on the forums!  I took a bit of a holiday myself.  :)

Thank you sir!  It has been one heck of a ride....can't wait for it to stop!  The one thing you can do is go give your wife a big hug and kiss!  I'm a big supporter of that now.  You just never know.  Thank you again!

Bobby

TB...Thank you!  I have wondered the same thing, and the one year has come up a lot.  All the holidays, special days, etc. have to be walked out without the loved one.  It's tough, but with friends like the ones here on the forums, it helps for sure!  And the advise on the kids...thank you!  They are my awesome children and I will do all to help them through this.

Again, Thank you so much!

Bobby

Eagle....wow!  I had chills reading that and oh yeah, it hit me hard, but in a good way.  I have felt my wife a couple of times.  A pray all the time for a solid vision!  She was so beautiful...her smile....o.k. enough.  Dude, thank you.  That rocks and true.  Thank you so much!

Bobby

Hi Bobby ;

      I hope you and the kids are okay today . I thought about you last night when this very topic came up at a friend's house .They have a friend , No children , who's wife just left to be an angel to the same malady .

       He had asked my friend how long he should mourn .This is hard to answer . I do know in our culture it is a year . Native Americans give their loved ones time to cross over and then they get on with life .This is Not for everyone though .

  When the time is right you will find a friend . Let that idea be .You now have to make this transition understandable for the children . Answer any question they have truthfully . If you tear up , so be it . Let them do so with you . You will remain a core family that way . God ease your burden and I will be in touch soon . DOC - Tanker - Builder

I am going to pass on to you something that I found after my wife passed away.  I have found it to be more true in many ways than a lot of the stuff I have seen or read.  It will probably choke you up but it is so very worth it.

I Have Only Slipped Away Into The Next Room

Whatever we were together, that we are still

Call me by name.  Speak to me in the easy way you always did.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.

Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.

Let my name be spoken without effort.

Life means all that is ever meant.  It is the same as it ever was.

Why should I be out of your mind because I am out of your sght?

I am but waiting for an interval, somewhere very near-- just around the corner.

All is well. Nothing is past; nothing is lost.

One brief moment and all will be as it was before--onlly better, infinitely

happier and forever--we will all be one together with Christ.

      Author Unknown

I actually could sense my late lady hanging around for a good long while after she passed.  Then it became less and less often.  She rarely visits these days, though several months ago I was walking through the house to the neccessary room and out of the blue I got that unique chill and a strong thought/memory/vision of her.

She just stopped by and said "Hi!" I guess.  Kind of freaky in a good way.  One of those things.

Hope this helps a little.

Hey TB, now that was a special lady!  I know it is too early for me to be thinking of this, but, I just can't see me with anyone else.  I mean, at this point, I would not do anyone fair justice.  I would be comparing them to her.  So, in time who knows, but I have my kids to keep me busy now!    But if and when it happens, I sure hope I'm as blessed as you and find someone that special!

Thank you TB, great words of encouragement!  Thank you my friend!

Bobby

Bobby ;

  I do have to tell you this though .My second wife was so loving , she let me have those quiet moments with my first wife's memories .That made me realize how special She was . Now you know why I said I was blessed . You will make it and you will do well . My prayers will always be with you and the Children every step of the way .   T.B.

Hey Mike!  Thank you!  And I will be praying that the cancer NEVER returns!  I love hearing the stories where someone beats that.....I can't even use the words I want to to describe that aweful cancer!  Anyway, I am very happy to hear she is doing well! But don't forget those extra hugs everytime you see her!    Thank you again for the thoughts and prayers!

Bobby

Very wise words TB!  And very true.  It is very difficult right now to look at pics, but I have them all at the ready.  I'll admit, I lose it big time when I look at them, but I do.  She was everything and I miss her dearly, and sometimes I just have to look at a pic.  That and for the kids.  Especially my youngest.  He may not remember too much about her and I want ever thing possible for him to have and see. 

Thanks again, and those memories will always stay strong in me and my kids!  Thank you my friend!

Bobby

I am so very sorry for the loss to you and your family.  My wife had cancer surgery back in February and is doing very well.  I can not even begin to imagine what you are going through even after my scare.  Sending positive thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

Mike

Bobby ;

 After I responded I thought about something that I didn't mention before . If you have any pictures of the two of you .Keep them ! Yes ! Keep them . Put them in a safe place and refer to them from time to time .

       I know everyone including me said we have to move on .Tis , true .BUT every once in a while we need to remind ourselves that Life can indeed be good . Her , You , Against the world . Then the kids .

     These Children are the books of love you both wrote defining your love and place in the scheme of things . Don't let that go . Savor it like a very fine , very rare wine .

 You can be the toughest S.O.B. on the world . But you cannot be the one to know when your heart will crumble and you turn into a gibbering crying fool . Except one thing .You are no fool . Let those feelings out . It's a long road now . Keep her alive in your heart and draw strength from those memories .Okay ? Tanker - Builder

Thank you Tigerman!  And divorce is a devastating life event too!  So trivial?  No, just another life changing event one must walk out.  Not any easier I'm sure.  Thank you again!

Bobby

Thank you Mustang!  All thoughts and prayers are appreciated!  Move forward in positive steps!  I like that, and will do my best everyday to do so!  Thank you again my friend!

Bobby

My divorce seems trivial to what you went through.  I wish you the best in the years ahead.

I am truly sorry to hear of yours and your kids loss of a wife and mother. I'll be thinking of you and your two little ones and praying for all three of you. Continue to move forward in positive steps pal, your friend Joe.

Hey Joe!  Thank you so much!  Thank you for the prayers, they are appreciated.  And thank you for the support!  It has been amazing the response from this.  Truly a great bunch of people here!

Thank you for the offer!  They closed the job opening this week, so, according to HR I should hear if I passed the panel in 6-8 weeks.  I've made plans to have my supply porition of my modeling stuff to be sent.  As for models!  As of right now, I plan on heading to Orlando Saturday and going to the model show there.  As you said, I think it will be therapeutic.  Everyone here is pushing me to go.  I don't do much after work, just go to my sisters and take care of the kids.  Both my kids are learning to swim!  Very cool.  So thank you sir!  Very kind of you to offer!

Again, thank you Joe!  Your thoughts and prayers mean the world to me and my family!

Bobby

Oh Lord Bobby, I am so immensely sorry to hear about the loss of your wife. I always had a prayer here and there for you and your family since we last chatted. I am certainly saddened that she lost her hard fought battle. I will ensure that my prayers include you and your children. I will pray that you all heal and find peace. If you ever need to just chat or some support please feel free to give me a shout.

Also, if there is any kind of glitch getting your models and supplies in a timely manner just let me know. I'll be more than happy to send you a little care package to get you through until your fully in business again. Trust me, i know all too well the therapeutic effects of working on my models. That alone has got me through some rather rough moments.

Again Bobby, My heart goes out to you. I know that you will be OK but, please, know that you do not have to do it alone. We're all here for you.

Godspeed.

Your Friend, Joe