A person can stand almost anything except a procession of ordinary days.
-Goethe
Happy Birthday!!! It damn well beats the alternative.
In spirit I will cook you a birthday dinner.
Heat one can of red hot chili con carne.
Open one bag of shredded cheddar, the really bright orange kind.
Open one super sized bag of Frito "scoops". Because you are really special to me, the barbeque ones.
Dump chili into bag, top with cheese, seal and shake a little.
This is really best eaten from the bag.