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Having fun in the colonoscopy room.

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  • Member since
    August 2021
Posted by lurch on Monday, May 2, 2022 8:46 AM

TOJO thanks I needed a good laugh.

  • Member since
    April 2020
Posted by Eaglecash867 on Monday, May 2, 2022 6:11 AM

"So I drank that devil concoction the day before.  It really cleans you out.  I felt a very unpleasant episode coming and ran to the master bathroom 15 feet away.  Paul, it needed to be 10 feet."

LOL, Paul!  When I do the prep part the day before, I drink the stuff, drink the bucket of water afterward, pull a chair into the bathroom to set my laptop on for Netflix, and then settle in...its gonna be a long night. Pirate

Lurch, there wasn't much humor in my first one either, but I already knew what the results were going to be...it was really just a formality to begin the process of determining staging (Stage 3 in my case).  I was 48 at the time, and I guess the previous 26 years of sitting above L-band antennas putting out about 200 watts of microwave radiation for hours at a time while doing transponder and altimeter certifications wasn't a good thing.  These days I turn the tester on and leave the area while its working and the FAA no longer allows us to do open-air testing above field elevation, so its a quick test and then we pull the breakers.  Don't want to go through all of that again, that's for sure.  This Thursday will mark 2 years of it being in remission.  

"You can have my illegal fireworks when you pry them from my cold, dead fingers...which are...over there somewhere."

  • Member since
    March 2003
  • From: Western North Carolina
Posted by Tojo72 on Sunday, May 1, 2022 9:07 PM

Just as long as they don't play banjo music when you walk in.

  • Member since
    December 2002
  • From: Fort Knox
Posted by Rob Gronovius on Sunday, May 1, 2022 8:43 PM

The Army gave me one while I was awake once upon a time. Yeah, it felt like an arm was twisting my guts as I watched it on the TV.

Had one within the last month or so, a much better affair when you're put under.

  • Member since
    August 2021
Posted by goldhammer88 on Sunday, May 1, 2022 8:24 PM

GMorrison

I'm lucky, I qualify for the "the poop is in the mail" routine.

 

 

Bill

 

I hear that, just got the results back from mine.  Now they want a colonoscopy to determine if hemorrhoids, polyps, or maybe a bleeding ulcer.

Just turned 69, and with all the other health issues, doesn't make much difference what gets me first.  Besides, normal circumstances, I just barely make it, and that's 25' from the chair.

  • Member since
    June 2017
  • From: Winter Park, FL
Posted by fotofrank on Sunday, May 1, 2022 7:57 PM

At my last physical, my doctor informed me that I have "aged out" of the need for a colonoscopy. I'll be 76 end of June. What a relief.

OK. In the stash: Way too much to build in one lifetime...

  • Member since
    August 2021
Posted by lurch on Sunday, May 1, 2022 7:20 PM

When I had mine done it wasnt as funny as your was. But glad you had at least a littlefun with yours. It made me laugh some.

  • Member since
    October 2004
  • From: Orlando, Florida
Posted by ikar01 on Sunday, May 1, 2022 6:30 PM

Next time remember Young Frankenstein:

Oh sweet mystery of life I found you.

Oh at last I know the secret of it all!

  • Member since
    September 2012
Posted by GMorrison on Sunday, May 1, 2022 6:05 PM

I'm lucky, I qualify for the "the poop is in the mail" routine.

That's funny Johnny. Nothing like a 73 year old rock star on the juice.

 

Bill

 Modeling is an excuse to buy books.

 

  • Member since
    January 2020
  • From: Maryland
Posted by wpwar11 on Sunday, May 1, 2022 5:26 PM

I'm way overdue for my first one.  I'm 52.  My cousin just called me after his experience. The day before ritual was a disaster.  When I asked him what happened his dialouge went something like this:  "So I drank that devil concoction the day before.  It really cleans you out.  I felt a very unpleasant episode coming and ran to the master bathroom 15 feet away.  Paul, it needed to be 10 feet."

  • Member since
    April 2020
Posted by Eaglecash867 on Sunday, May 1, 2022 5:11 PM

LOL!  

The last one I had 2 years ago, I actually remember toward the end of the procedure, and the video monitor was right in front of me.  I came out of the anesthesia singing the Oompa Loompa song from Willy Wonka.  There was definitely laughter in the room as I became fully conscious again.  Heh...must have had something to do with the video image of the "tunnel".

OY!  Have another one coming up in about 4 months.  I'm with you on the prep day beforehand.  The day after is "fun" too when you finally get the release of all that gas they pump in there to open things up.  It was so loud, I was just sure my neighbors could hear it.  Good times.  

"You can have my illegal fireworks when you pry them from my cold, dead fingers...which are...over there somewhere."

  • Member since
    March 2015
  • From: Close to Chicago
Having fun in the colonoscopy room.
Posted by JohnnyK on Sunday, May 1, 2022 4:49 PM

I had a colonoscopy last Thursday and everything is just hunky-dory.

I had everyone in the proceedure room in stitches.

Me - "Hey doc, is this my final colonoscopy based upon may age."

Doc - "This is your fourth one. How old are you?"

Me - "I'll  be 73 in July."

Doc -"Maybe just one more."

Nurse - "73!!!! I thought you were 50!"

Doc -  "Did you say 50? You'll need at lest three more!"

Me to the nurse - "Thanks for nothing. You're fired."

Everyone in the room starts laughing.

Me - "Hey doc, you should be playing Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb"."

Doc -  "Why is that?"

Me - "The first verse goes like this, "Hello, hello, hello, is there anybody in there"?"

The entire room errupts in laughter. The anesthesiologist is laughing so hard that tears are running down her cheeks. 

Me - "Let's get this show on the road. Slip me the juice" I fall into a deep slumber as I watch the milky white liquid run down the IV . I felt nothing and I have no memory of the experience. Of course, the previous  "prep-day" was another story.

Your comments and questions are always welcome.

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