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How to get back every part the “Monster” has eaten…for $1500

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  • Member since
    April 2005
  • From: Piscataway, NJ!
How to get back every part the “Monster” has eaten…for $1500
Posted by wing_nut on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 9:48 AM

Forget the vacuum with pantyhose stuck on the end.  Forget crawling around on your hands and knees.  This is guaranteed to find every piece that was tweezerpulted into the gaping maw of the carpet monster. Shock [:O]

The carpet monster is apparently a sentient being that survives in multiple plains whereby it not only biologically bonds with each individual fiber of the carpets, the putrid gas it gives offDead [xx(] fills the air space between the fibers.  This essentially makes the entire carpet the monster.  I know now that “carpet monster” no longer refers to the monster that lives in the carpet; more is that the carpet is the monster itself.  However it is infinitely more fun to view it as the former than the latter.Wink [;)]

Step 1.  Go out and buy $1500 worth of carpet to redo the room where your bench is located.  Think about it… what other reason in the world would you undertake steps 2 & 3. (Yes it was SWMBO that mandated the actionDisapprove [V]

Step 2. Move every stick of furniture out of the room.  Have fun trying to figure where to put a room full of furniture into rooms that are full of furniture.

Step 3. This is where the fun starts.  Cut the old carpet into manageable pieces to be removed.  As the “carpet” is disemboweled,Tongue [:P] the lost pieces will fall to the floor and all you have to do is sweep it into a pile,  put on a dust mask and pick through the crud.

You would not believe the pile of crap I found from so far back I barely remember losing the stuff.Laugh [(-D]

 

Marc  

  • Member since
    August 2006
  • From: Neenah, WI
Posted by HawkeyeHobbies on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 10:56 AM

I can't believe you would admit that! It reminds me of the time an old neighbor asked me to help him carry an old couch out of his house. When we pulled the cushions off we found someone's pocket change, a pasifier and crumbs...he said to his wife...how many years have we been looking for that nook? His wife could have shot him on the spot...she was so embarrassed.

Worse yet, I bought a car from a coworker...he wasn't a tidy guy, but when I returned much of what had found its way down behind the rear seat he was also embarrassed...his wallet which he had lost three years prior...a pair of ladies panties...obviously not his wifes (size was the dead giveaway). I also collected about thirty dollars in change which I pocketed. I only paid a couple hundred for the car so it was a nice rebate! Never learned who the bloomers belonged to, but the one who wore the huge drawers in the house divorced him. I sold the car a few weeks later after cleaning it up and made a tidy profit above the change I pocketed. 

Gerald "Hawkeye" Voigt

http://hawkeyes-squawkbox.com/

 

 

"Its not the workbench that makes the model, it is the modeler at the workbench."

  • Member since
    February 2007
  • From: Bournemouth UK
Posted by Luftwoller on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 11:10 AM

Well Marc, as a Vegetarian, i couldnt possibly kill the carpet monster. The thought of cutting him into manageable pieces. Brrrrr, makes me shiver. Live and let live an all. Also i believe that carpet monsters in general are hermaphrodites (Being both genders simultaniously) So all you have succeded in doing is producing several more of the blighters ready to scarper to the nearest modellers abode. I will willingly beat the swine to a bloody and unrecognisable pulp, inorder to retrieve its stomach contents.

Hawkeye, My future ex-missus's boy works at a furniture shop and often has to go to collect furniture from properties. He calls sofas with stuff in 'Rattlers' and often makes £20-£30 ($40-$60) a week in 'Finds'. I on the other hand work on a bus as a driver, all i find down the seats is******in general. Find it once, your not so quick to search next time. LOL.

...Guy

..'Your an embarrassment to the human genus, makes me ashamed to call myself Homo'.
  • Member since
    February 2008
  • From: ladner BC Canada
Posted by stick man on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 11:37 AM

Sooooooooooo I'm takeing a guses here but......... Wing(track)_nut are we spost'a reapeat the "find' method after every build that we loose somthing?

Smile [:)]

I'm 15 and I model I sk8board and I drum what could be better.
  • Member since
    April 2005
  • From: Piscataway, NJ!
Posted by wing_nut on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 12:09 PM
LOL stick man.... that would cost a pile-o-dough.

Marc  

  • Member since
    August 2006
  • From: Neenah, WI
Posted by HawkeyeHobbies on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 12:32 PM

Carpet Monster Removal Kit

 

Gerald "Hawkeye" Voigt

http://hawkeyes-squawkbox.com/

 

 

"Its not the workbench that makes the model, it is the modeler at the workbench."

  • Member since
    February 2008
  • From: ladner BC Canada
Posted by stick man on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 12:53 PM
 HawkeyeHobbies wrote:

Carpet Monster Removal Kit

 

Confused [%-)] How dose that get your missing parts back?  I mean it would be fun and all (Evil [}:)])but no parts. 

Smile [:)]

 

I'm 15 and I model I sk8board and I drum what could be better.
  • Member since
    July 2003
  • From: Bicester, England
Posted by KJ200 on Thursday, July 24, 2008 1:49 PM

Marc, I'm going to refute your theory that the carpet is the monster.

I know this because I have a laminate floor and the monster still manages to steal many of the parts I drop.

I do think it lives in the shadows under my desk though.

Karl

Currently on the bench: AZ Models 1/72 Mig 17PF

  • Member since
    August 2006
  • From: Neenah, WI
Posted by HawkeyeHobbies on Thursday, July 24, 2008 3:53 PM

No, what you're referring to is its cousin the Linoleum Lizard! Wink [;)]

Specifically the subspecies Vinylattractus Partdisappearus. This is a dreaded and unwanted house guest. It is usually accompanied by another criter..Dustbunnie Plentihuemungus.

All of which are most prolific breeders.Wink [;)]

Gerald "Hawkeye" Voigt

http://hawkeyes-squawkbox.com/

 

 

"Its not the workbench that makes the model, it is the modeler at the workbench."

  • Member since
    May 2003
  • From: Abbotsford, B.C. Canada
Posted by DrewH on Thursday, July 24, 2008 10:04 PM
 HawkeyeHobbies wrote:

No, what you're referring to is its cousin the Linoleum Lizard! Wink [;)]

Specifically the subspecies Vinylattractus Partdisappearus. This is a dreaded and unwanted house guest. It is usually accompanied by another criter..Dustbunnie Plentihuemungus.

All of which are most prolific breeders.Wink [;)]

Now I've heard it all!

Take this plastic and model it!
  • Member since
    April 2005
  • From: Piscataway, NJ!
Posted by wing_nut on Friday, July 25, 2008 6:39 PM

So... Virginisys Pilecarpetour Nylonus has been installed.  Several parts dropped have been sitting high and proud on the top fibers ready to be picked and glued in place.

Let's have a moment of silence for the passing of my carpet monster... 

 

NOT! 

Marc  

  • Member since
    July 2003
  • From: Bicester, England
Posted by KJ200 on Sunday, July 27, 2008 11:07 AM
 HawkeyeHobbies wrote:

No, what you're referring to is its cousin the Linoleum Lizard! Wink [;)]

Specifically the subspecies Vinylattractus Partdisappearus. This is a dreaded and unwanted house guest. It is usually accompanied by another criter..Dustbunnie Plentihuemungus.

All of which are most prolific breeders.Wink [;)]

That explains alot. 

I thought I was doing the smart thing installing a laminate floor!

Foiled again.

Karl

 

Currently on the bench: AZ Models 1/72 Mig 17PF

  • Member since
    July 2013
Posted by DURR on Sunday, July 27, 2008 11:16 AM

or  you could just work on a hardwood floor

easier to clean too

  • Member since
    April 2008
  • From: Philadelphia PA
Posted by smeagol the vile on Sunday, July 27, 2008 2:24 PM

The problem is not that the monster likes to eat our parts, but simply, as I have observed, it likes to play catch with itself.  Drop a piece and watch it bounce accross the room. So what you have to do is;

A-take up the rug and put down a solid floor, something without gaps or cracks.

B-cover everwhere that you do NOT step with double sided tape.

 

Sounds like alot of work, but not a single piece will ever bounce again. 

 

  • Member since
    August 2006
  • From: Neenah, WI
Posted by HawkeyeHobbies on Sunday, July 27, 2008 4:00 PM
Oh no! I've fallen and I am now stuck to all that darn double sided tape...oh the embarrasment!Ashamed [*^_^*]

Gerald "Hawkeye" Voigt

http://hawkeyes-squawkbox.com/

 

 

"Its not the workbench that makes the model, it is the modeler at the workbench."

  • Member since
    February 2007
  • From: Bournemouth UK
Posted by Luftwoller on Sunday, July 27, 2008 4:12 PM

This thread is way cool btw. Am i the only one who when dropping a minute part on the carpet monster/ lino lizard, gets another piece of similar wieghted sprue and drop that to see where that one bounces too. Only to eventually find the part 8ft away. How the heck does a part, the weight of a fleas undercrackers, hit the floor then bounce 8-10ft away?

Also, im sure the carpet monster copys your tweezers and replaces them with a tweezerpult that looks exactly the same. Grrrr i hate him, but in a loving caring sort of way. Big Smile [:D]

...Guy

..'Your an embarrassment to the human genus, makes me ashamed to call myself Homo'.
  • Member since
    July 2003
  • From: Bicester, England
Posted by KJ200 on Sunday, July 27, 2008 4:29 PM

Don't forget many Carpet Monsters/Lino Lizards have an accomplice.

My Lino Lizard has one who answers to the name of Willow...

She has already accounted for the gear doors from a Raiden, and nearly had the landing gear for my He111 away the other day.

Don't let looks deceive you, she is in league with Lucifer!Evil [}:)]

Karl

Currently on the bench: AZ Models 1/72 Mig 17PF

  • Member since
    April 2008
  • From: Philadelphia PA
Posted by smeagol the vile on Sunday, July 27, 2008 10:41 PM

That is why I trained my cats to run like heck away from my modeling room. 

The 'piece weighing nothing' and bouncing 8 feet is one thing.  but I SWEAR my pieces will drop then bounce toward the most cuttered part of my room.   I clean out this one part of under my next every so often and I find so mcuh stuff I didnt even know I lost

 

  • Member since
    February 2008
  • From: ladner BC Canada
Posted by stick man on Tuesday, July 29, 2008 2:54 PM

You guys forgot the other freind of the carpet monstor the.......... Hardwoodfloorcrackalacukus!

And my carpet monster is trying to train my bunny to eat model parts! but thats why the door to the modeling cave is closed when he's out.

I got this photo of the rabit training in action sadly the carpet monster was absent from the secne but the Hardwoodfloorcrackalacukus was there training him to eat Cristmass ornamants with means only one thing...... He'll be training on my models parts soon!!!!!

Smile [:)]

I'm 15 and I model I sk8board and I drum what could be better.
  • Member since
    April 2008
  • From: Philadelphia PA
Posted by smeagol the vile on Tuesday, July 29, 2008 3:11 PM
I cant be the only one who thinks that bunny is freakin adorable

 

  • Member since
    March 2008
  • From: Cheney, WA
Posted by FastasEF on Tuesday, July 29, 2008 11:08 PM

Lol. This thread is awesome. I laughed when I got to the bottom and saw the Beagle and the bunny. As i've owned 5 Beagles when living with my parents and I currently own a bunny, (never both at the same time).

He has his own little area of the house, I gave up on trying to get him to not eat everything.

Josh

  • Member since
    February 2008
  • From: ladner BC Canada
Posted by stick man on Tuesday, July 29, 2008 11:45 PM

Bunnys are my favorat pet exept for when thay try to eat everything!

Hay has the Rugrat been mentioned a another Axis alli?

Smile [:)]

I'm 15 and I model I sk8board and I drum what could be better.
  • Member since
    April 2008
  • From: Philadelphia PA
Posted by smeagol the vile on Wednesday, July 30, 2008 2:40 AM

Well... as bad as all the 'monsters' are.  Must we not forget all of our pieces lost by the force of nature known as the 'mother/wife/girlfriend/whomever cleaning where they are not suposto' OR 'the vaccume'

 

 

  • Member since
    February 2008
  • From: ladner BC Canada
Posted by stick man on Wednesday, July 30, 2008 11:54 AM

 smeagol the vile wrote:
'the vaccume'

 

I have nightmares about what would hapin if that thing got IN one of my madel boxs!!!! u see I keep all the kits I'm working on on the floor because I work on the coffy table in front of the TV most of the time.

well we can add the vacume to the list of evil.

Smile [:)]

I'm 15 and I model I sk8board and I drum what could be better.
  • Member since
    February 2003
Posted by Jim Barton on Friday, August 1, 2008 6:14 PM
 HawkeyeHobbies wrote:

Carpet Monster Removal Kit

 

 

Laugh [(-D]Thumbs Up [tup]Thumbs Up [tup]

Great idea, Hawkeye! However here's one reason why I don't own a gun: If I ever bought one, the first thing I'd do is shoot myself in the foot!Dunce [D)]Sign - Oops [#oops]

"Whaddya mean 'Who's flying the plane?!' Nobody's flying the plane!"

  • Member since
    March 2005
  • From: West Virginia, USA
Posted by mfsob on Saturday, August 2, 2008 2:32 PM
I'm dreading the day they ever decide to replace the carpet in my apartment, I will be well and truly screwed when all those 1/700 bodies start falling out of it ...
  • Member since
    July 2005
  • From: Dayton, Ohio
Posted by warhorse3 on Saturday, August 2, 2008 2:55 PM
You're not the only one that the CSI's will have a busy day with.
Regards, Bill
  • Member since
    April 2005
  • From: Piscataway, NJ!
Posted by wing_nut on Tuesday, August 5, 2008 8:01 AM
A bonus affect from the new carpet.  The new carpet smell from the off gassing of whatever it is seems to have improved my vision and slowed time.  I was working with some small PE parts and sure enough... PRANG... tweezerpulted into space.  My eye wnet to the part in mid flight and i was able to watch the entire ballistic arc in what appeared to be slow motion all the way to the carpet.  Just bend down and picked it upTongue [:P]

Marc  

  • Member since
    April 2008
  • From: Philadelphia PA
Posted by smeagol the vile on Tuesday, August 5, 2008 8:05 AM
You have so given a so many people (me not included) to build models while high

 

  • Member since
    February 2007
  • From: Bournemouth UK
Posted by Luftwoller on Tuesday, August 5, 2008 12:17 PM

Marc, Sorry, Grasshopper. You have achieved the ultimate modelling state of Zen. If you had chopsticks, im sure you could have plucked the piece from the air. You are the ultimate modeller. Bow [bow]

...Guy

..'Your an embarrassment to the human genus, makes me ashamed to call myself Homo'.
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