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The Missing Commandments

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  • Member since
    December 2008
  • From: Las Vegas, Nevada
Posted by model maniac 96 on Wednesday, July 29, 2009 4:15 PM
Nice, thanks!
"Veni, Vidi, Vici" Julius Caesar: I came, I saw, I conquered.
  • Member since
    October 2004
  • From: Katy, TX
Posted by jthurston on Wednesday, July 29, 2009 3:55 PM
...and there was much rejoicing...
  • Member since
    April 2008
  • From: Charlottesville Va
Posted by Stern0 on Wednesday, July 29, 2009 2:07 PM
Words to live by!Big Smile [:D]
Always Faithful U.S.M.C
  • Member since
    November 2006
  • From: Massachusetts
Posted by jadgpanther302 on Wednesday, July 22, 2009 8:51 PM
THats Awesome!
  • Member since
    December 2002
  • From: Massachusetts
The Missing Commandments
Posted by ajlafleche on Monday, July 20, 2009 2:08 PM

I keep seeing the question, is this a vignette or a diorama or a single figure. Now, we have the answer...

From my club's newsletter:

"Well now way back in the Bible
Temptations always come along
There's always somebody tempting
Somebody into doing something they."

Sorry, wrong reference.

But way back then, Moses, as we all know, thanks to Charlton Heston, came down from his time with the Burning Bush with two tablets of laws. Now, as we also know, Mel Brooks discovered there was a third tablet which was dropped and broken, leaving us with ten, rather than the intended fifteen, commandments.

Well, during my summer vacation, I took an archeological trip to the Middle East and found the remnants of that third tablet. Surprisingly, it had to do with figure modeling.

Now, for the first time, I present Commandments XI through XV.

XI. If thou shalt presenteth a figure, thou shalt presenteth that figure on a base, for thy figure must have context. A figure that has no context is an abomination and if thou shalt presenteth a figure that thou hast not given context in the form of a base, thou shalt be ignored when great recompenses for figures are given.

XII. If thou shalt presenteth a figure, be he standing, or sitting in a chair, or riding a horse or ***, and there is no other figure presented with him, he shall be judged as a figure, either a figure of foot or a figure mounted, but he shall not be judged as a vignette, even though there shall be ground work, of land, or of water, or of tree, or of rock, or of metal, for the single figure doth not tell the tale.

XII. If thou shalt presenteth a figure which doth hath another figure or several figures with the first figure, be they standing, or sitting in a chair, or riding a horse or ***, or each in his own horse or ***, thy presentation shalt be judged as a vignette, for there are no chariots, or homes, or tents, and thy story tells of a smaller tale, but thy story, too, shalt be judged, for thou hast attempted to telleth the tale. But if thou doth presenteth greater than 7 figures, thy work shall not be judged as a vignette but as a diorama for the tale thou telleth doth have greatness of scope that doth exceedeth the greatness of the vignette.

XIV. If thou shalt presenteth a tale, great in its scope, with multitudes of figures, their chariots and their homes, their horses and their asses, their cattle and their chattel, and landscapes of land, or of water, or of tree, or of rock, or of metal,and of all things that groweth from the earth, thy work shall be judged as a diorama for thy tale hath greatness, but be thou wary, for the telling of thy tale shall be judged as well as the subjects thou hast chosen with which to telleth the tale, for the tale consisteth of all its parts. If the figures of thy tale be wanting, thou shalt be judged harshly though thy landscapes be great in execution; likewise, if thy landscapes be found wanting tough thy figures be presented with much expertise, thou shall again be judged harshly; and yet again, if the elements of thy tale do not tell the tale clearly and with understanding to he who shalt vieweth thy presentation, thou shalt be judged harshly.

XV. This is the final commandment and the greatest of them, the one commandment to rule all commandments: if thou presenteth thy work to be judged, thou shalt not whineth at the judgments passed on thy presentation, for a whiner is an abomination, and thou, by having presented thy work for judgment must accepteth the judgment passed upon it for they who judgeth are great in wisdom and knowledge and passeth only judgments which are righteous and good and pleasing.

Remember, if the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.

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