Ten things I don't want to hear

True stories:

My wife once came in from taking the dog out to poop and said "I found that part you said was missing." I decided I didn't really need it that bad.

A friend came home from work one day and his wife told him she decided to clean off all those dusty model planes by swishing them around in the bathtub.

Sometimes it's what you don't hear... like where a small part lands after flying through the air! I had super glue on that thing and it just disapeared without a trace and not a sound. It was there one second and gone the next... maybe it was a wormhole...

^I swear there's a Twilight Zone somewhere chock full of lost plastic parts. It's one dimension over from the lost sock one.

That was funny! Good stuff!

"how come the wheels on that airplane can't roll"?

Boy,

I was wondering if the "Black Hole" was a condition that just I suffered from!! Sure am relieved to see others saying it happens to them too!

My wife doesn't come in my modeling room, and my older teenager doesn't want to, so I'm responsible for what cleaning gets done, but in all that cleaning, I rarely find any of the objects that have succomed to the Devils Triangle between my legs!!!

Also, here's something else you can think about: "If your work desk is 4' x 2', wonder why your work area's only 5" x 2"?

Frank

Two things that I can't stand:

1. The smell of burning rubber
2. The sound of a screaming woman

Things you don't want to hear?
Mine was a bit of a freakout -
While in traction (just out of ICU as a matter of fact) after a particularly nasty motorcycle accident, my darling mother (bless her little cotton socks) tried to lighten the moment by saying:
"I washed the dust off all your model planes by running them under water - were the decals supposed to come off and float away like that?"
I was not impressed.

I also don't want to hear "Does THIS turn?" Followed by the sound of snapping styrene.
Cheers
LeeTree

Hey all,
A year or two ago at our annual mall show I had a few a/c on club display.
My lovely F-16 was up in front showing her stuff when this lil runt I mean lil boy came and closed the canopy. I was shocked to have seen this happen right before my eyes. It happened so quickly that we could not respond fast enough. The parents were right there when he did it too.
The funny thing was that there was a sign right next to the plane which read: "Please Do Not Touch". I guess reading was not one of there strong points..!! LOL
Just to hear the sound of white glue and plastic snapping can make ones stomach go...!!

Heres a few for ya,
1. O look dad the bombs can be dropped.
2. Dad, was that suppose to do that..??
3. O look dear, Fido found himself a new chew toy
4. Dear, why is your hand stuck to your forehead and why is the superglue empty?
5. Hun, a few of these thinga-ma-bobs came off while I was dusting in your room!!.. You did what??
6. A few of bobby's friends came down to see your model room, they have been really quite ever since!
7. Why does FSM make it look so easy..LOL
8. I see lil billy used my paints for finger painting again.
9. Can I spin the propeller?
10. Mommy, why is daddy on his hands and knees looking at the floor. Hey mommy what did he just say???
Flaps up, Mike

why is it that if you scratch a part, odds are that it's clear?

H ow's about "Opps" from the doctor as he is using a very sharp scalpel?

I think I have heard some of those things around here in the past (especially after A. during the first few months of marriage and B. not long after each of my boys learned how to walk) Here's some other statements that I have heard over the last 30 odd years.

Statements (or prefaces) which can cause fear at AT (Summer Camp)

2nd Lt "It's been my experience that ......"
Capt "I've got this great Idea"
Sgt "Hey guys, watch this"

The four most feared things around an aircraft

1. Smoke
2. Flame
3. Loud noises
4. Sudden silences

And you just thought it happened around models! lol

How about: "The good news is that i fixed your TV/car/computer. The bad news is that i have all these left over bits."
Also i don't like it when the pilot of your flight gets on the intercom and gives you the "Welcome to flight 1234... blah, blah" and he stops in the middle of the sentence. I imagine that all the warning lights in the cockpit are going off at the same time!

How 'bout -- "Honey, we have to talk."

"Don't worry; I'm going for help" - from your pilot as he cinches up his 'chute harness and opens the aft door

Bad things to hear:
The sounds of a cat digging in a room not equiped with a litter box.
Silence when there are little kids or cats around.
Gnawing coming from a room other than where the gerbil/hamster/... is supposed to be.
A crash followed by a lot of swearing from my bedroom. (Models and ceramics)

Hey all,
Heres another good one,
What a WSZO/RIO does not want to hear coming from the front seat!
Watch this..!! followed by AAHHH SH*T
Flaps up, Mike

You go to draw a parachute, and the stumbling drunk you saw at the Enlisted Mens Club the night before is a "rigger". Oh S**t!

Has anyone else put something some where, and find that it somehow moved somewhere else all by it self? No one moved it, nor did they see it. Maybe the dog moved it, and isn't talking? One of these days I'm going to Super Glue something of mine to the kitchen table, just to see what "she" does! I know, it's my fault I married her!rangerj

Here's one that an airframe mechanic absolutely hates:

Birdstrike

Heh.. My dad was informed that there was bird debris on the runway after he took off.. And low and behold he had had a bird strike. A seagull into the nosegear well of the Saab 340.

According to him the smell of fish was horrible..

QUOTE: Originally posted by rangerj You go to draw a parachute, and the stumbling drunk you saw at the Enlisted Mens Club the night before is a "rigger". Oh S**t! Has anyone else put something some where, and find that it somehow moved somewhere else all by it self? No one moved it, nor did they see it. Maybe the dog moved it, and isn't talking? One of these days I'm going to Super Glue something of mine to the kitchen table, just to see what "she" does! I know, it's my fault I married her!rangerj

Reminds me of the book "Who moved my cheese ?"

Hobbyroom cleaning by foreigners to model making should be made criminal offence.
The most annoying thing is that they make you feel guilty afterwards...."Comeon its only silly toys" is the killing motto. .......

Why do you have so many still in boxes?

You don't need another model?

It cost how much?

When are you going to clean this mess?

How can you work in here?

I think the basement flooded. . .

(Insert son/daughter name here) Had a school project so they went down and got one of your models to build, you have so many.

Yes it's nice, what does it do?

It just sits there?

How many of those little paint thingys do you really need?

Odd how these sayings bring a tear to the eye or a knowing nod.

Don

How bout:

Honey, I vacuumed you model room last night. Yeah, I already tossed the bag, today was trash day stupid.

When my 19 year old brings his college buddies to the house:
Hey dude, does it fly............crash!

How about, " Uncle Scott, that model helicopter just fell off the shelf all by itself."
Scott

Dropping the part, usually clear, thus precluding repair...........

........getting up, stepping back......

.....CRUNCH........

'Hello, spares hotline, my ??????? appears to be missing part no.????'

Karl

one of my least favourite things to hear is "sorry its out of stock" usually followed - after my next question - by" no they ain't, the mold is in for repair"

and also, "the model shop phoned today, i thought you said that model you ordered only cost..............."
Greg

Anything that starts with..."Ah...I have a confession to make".. and when a pilot says "I did a little of my own troubleshooting, and I think the problem is this broken wire, or that broken object, when the switch was in the O-F-F posittion.

For me the one thing I never wanted to hear was.............................. Platoon commander " I have the map and compass...... follow me"

OR

"Yeah the cat eats plastic, strange huh?"