1. Black will be fine but personally I think it's too stark, and I'd mix black with the base paint, plus thinner, to get the wash. You need a colour that is significantly darker than the base colour. I'd keep pure black for washes I'd put over engine grilles and stuff like that where you need the impression of depth.
1 & 2. If you're using oil-based (such as turpentine, white-spirit,..) paints for your wash, DO MAKE CERTAIN your base colour is real dry. Wait several days. If not the turp will lift the paint underneath! Horror! I use washes made with watercolours in tubes (artist's paints) mixed with water and vinegar and dish-washing liquid and that's the safest way I've ever found to apply a wash...
The proportion of paint/thinner is hard to define. Try 10% paint, 90% thinner first. If the effect is not strong enough, apply a stronger wash. Better be safe and start with something weak.
3. I do not varnish at all after washes/drybrushing/weathering because it will dull the effects I'm trying to achieve..! If you need varnish, for instance because you want to seal the decals or eliminate their shinyness, do it before applying the washes. But do let it dry before going on to the next phase...!