I know that no one here wants to read bad news all the time whether it be from the news on T.V., the paper, or here, but I haven't been feeling too well lately. My lungs hurt, and my heart hurts. My lungs have been hurting since my baby kitty died last week. I haven't been eating, or drinking enough to keep a bird alive, and now my internal organs hurt as well. It even hurts every time I inhale. We've been fighting to keep the baby alive with all that we had while fighting a losing battle! I felt that the vet was right when he said she might not live, but I didn't know just how long she would last in the expectation that she would die soon. This is why I took as many pictures as I could of my miracle baby before her time would come. I didn't know that this would affect me so hard, but lately I don't care about eating no matter how hungry I get. I force myself to drink for the fear of dehydration as I don't feel thirsty either.
I haven't had time to see anyone about the depression that has now set in. I'm afraid that I might have damaged organs now from not drinking enough. I already felt bad when my grandmother died, but now I have a double whammy! Two losses in four months is a lot more than I can take obviously. I think I feel my health failing.
I'm sorry if I was a wet blanket to the other members here as I've been using the forum to release my frustrations when I shouldn't have. This won't happen anymore, especially if I don't live to see the end of this month, or to the end of this year. I need to see a doctor to find out if there is any permament physical damage that might not be reversable. It may be too little, too late for me as well since my kidneys hurt, and feel swollen as do the rest of my internal organs in my body. My heart has hurt for quite a while now even before Weepy died. We have a history of heart disease in my family so it's no surprise. If this is indeed the end for me please know that I enjoyed being here, and that I hope that others here can inspire the creativity that I had hope to. I don't know what I'm going to do with the rest of my models, and tools, but as soon as I find out what's going on then I'll post my stuff for either sale, or for the price of shipping depending on the kit/tools that I part with. Thank you all for reading.
~ Cobra Chris