Writing styles in reviews or how-to's: Does this irritate anyone else?

Personally, I am kind of a fan of first person active voice. Probably because it is what I am used to.

While on patrol of the forum I encountered a German General. I could tell by his muppet-like appearance, and love of cats this was likely the forum member know as "Manny."

Hans von Hammer

 

fermis:

 

When looking at a review, the price is always sought out first. This usually mean that the review will not be read, because that particular kit will not be bought for that price, by this guy!

 Both ways kinda bug me, in their own ways.

 

 

Double-dog ditto!

Reviews, for me at least, are generally just long-winded ads... I'd love to read a review that ended with, "Frankly, I wouldn't buy this kit with YOUR money"...  But what really happens is that the reviewer always ends up generally praising the kit, even if the "undertone" is negative... 

Also, I'd like to see the reviewed kits built WITHOUT paint or decals.. I wanna SEE how much filling and sanding is actually required if you want to convince me a kit's worth the money...  Bits of white plastic filling gaps, and feathered putty all over would be far more informative than any number of words... I can look at a photo of the finished and painted model on the side of the box...

But, to answer the question posed, nah... The writing style doesn't matter to me because, as Fermis said, after I look at the price, I can generally skip the review anyway... 

Usually, if I'm looking up a review of a kit, I've already got a pretty decent idea of its price, so that's never really been a concern.

I'm with you, though, Hammer, that most reviews do end up on a positive note. I take phrases like "fit is a bit iffy, but it builds up into a nice representation of..." as code for "IS TERRIBLE!".

I'd also love to see kits built without paint or decals. Though I do like seeing the kit decals evaluated, I think seeing the "naked" kit would be as if not more valuable.

TomZ2

echolmberg:

The one thing about reviews that angers me the most, however, is when the reviewer mentions all the "out of production" or "no longer available" paint, decals and aftermarket parts they used.

 

AMEN BROTHER!!!

"Unobtanium - a part (usually aftermarket) that looked good on another modeler's work but unfortunately is no longer available for your model."

That said, it only bothers me in a "how to" article, that is, one where there's at least the intimation that the piece could be duplicated. Work that is a one-off, e.g., a museum model or a presentation piece, I can just stand back and admire.

fermis

When looking at a review, the price is always sought out first. This usually mean that the review will not be read, because that particular kit will not be bought for that price, by this guy!

 Both ways kinda bug me, in their own ways.

Double-dog ditto!

Reviews, for me at least, are generally just long-winded ads... I'd love to read a review that ended with, "Frankly, I wouldn't buy this kit with YOUR money"...  But what really happens is that the reviewer always ends up generally praising the kit, even if the "undertone" is negative... 

Also, I'd like to see the reviewed kits built WITHOUT paint or decals.. I wanna SEE how much filling and sanding is actually required if you want to convince me a kit's worth the money...  Bits of white plastic filling gaps, and feathered putty all over would be far more informative than any number of words... I can look at a photo of the finished and painted model on the side of the box...

But, to answer the question posed, nah... The writing style doesn't matter to me because, as Fermis said, after I look at the price, I can generally skip the review anyway... 

The writing style doesnt really bug me.  If I can get OT, the thing that bugs me about FSM reviews is apologies by the builder.  "I didnt do such and such because I ran out of time"  I ran out of such-and such colour paint so I didnt paint this part"   I'm sorry, but if you are getting PAID by FSM to build models, my jaw had better hit the floor when I look at the finished product (like it does when I see doog's work, or those guys that build the cut-away models or super detailed (scratchbuilt) details on a kit.

Its the reason I'm going to let my subscription slide.  Not enough "wow" factor for me anymore.   I just see more and more reviewed models that just look rushed.   Either give the guy more time to build the kit, or get Doog on as one of your regular reviewers!

  Holy Cow! You must've been reading my mind Doogs. You crystallized my thoughts on this subject. ...Nothing more i can say. 

[It] doesn't really bother me that much Chris. If it is well written, detail-wise, I can handle the writing style.

DoogsATX

The thing that tends to gall me in reviews or how-tos is when a particularly involved technique, or involved part of the build, is just glossed over with "I weathered it" or "the fit was tricky, but manageable". HOW!?!?! Tell us how!

Oh Crap!  I forgot to dip my La-7 canopy in future before I painted it.  Oh wait.  The step where the canopy was to be dipped was omitted due to distractions  created by other interests shared by the modeler.  The awkwardly blue/gray paint was applied before the omission was discovered.  Life has gone on. The La-7 will live.  The fit was good.  Rick

echolmberg

The one thing about reviews that angers me the most, however, is when the reviewer mentions all the "out of production" or "no longer available" paint, decals and aftermarket parts they used.

AMEN BROTHER!!!

"Unobtanium - a part (usually aftermarket) that looked good on another modeler's work but unfortunately is no longer available for your model."

That said, it only bothers me in a "how to" article, that is, one where there's at least the intimation that the piece could be duplicated. Work that is a one-off, e.g., a museum model or a presentation piece, I can just stand back and admire.

 Hey , DOOGS ---AMEN !!!  tankerbuilder

The passive voice doesn't really bother me.  First person would, though.  If every sentence started with "I then...", that would bug me to no end.  The one thing about reviews that angers me the most, however, is when the reviewer mentions all the "out of production" or "no longer available" paint, decals and aftermarket parts they used.

The scariest 2nd person narrative in my opinion:

"It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again."

That just gives Eric the willies every time!

Eric

Meh, I just look at the pictures.

Passive voice doesn't offend me in technical writing. It bothers me more in a novel. However, good writing is a blend of all styles. I-I-I gets to be too much, and ends up every bit as distracting. Hard and fast rules are never hard and fast.

lol, this thread actually makes me laugh.

As a frequently-published, contributing author to Finescale Modeler and another European modeling magazine, I should straighten out the original poster about the process and method.

First, when I write an article, it's ALWAYS edited and re-written to some degree by the editorial staff of the magazine. Mostly, it is condensed to fit. So what you ultimately read is a synthesis of two or more writers.

Secondly, I agree with the poster here who said that too many first-person references feels like--well, to me, the primary writer--  almost sounding self-congratulatory or something? The different pronouns also mix up the flow, and prevent a monotonous cadence to the article.

As an author AND as a reader, what is MOST annoying, is when the publisher doesn't get a good printer and the photos come out radically different in chromatic tone than what your model actually looks like, or you can tell that the printer's colors are way off, like as in the super-reddish color of an exhaust or rusted piece. Luckily, I've never had this problem with Finescale Modeler.

Please, take into account, that although in the English-speaking world the use of passive voice is discouraged, in countries like Germany or Poland, for that matter, passive voice is a standard used in technical writing, where the focus is on the subject and the author tries to kind of "get out of the spotlight". This tendency is strong enough to cause problems when switching to English on another occasion. Also, imagine there was some teamwork involved - how about "Mike dipped it in future and then dave glued it with CA we got from George"

Have a nice day

Paweł

I'm glad Doogs pointed out that it's passive voice, but I understand your frustrations. Passive voice slows down reading and usually makes it bland. Just as "I did this and I did that" feels repetitive, so does "This was done and those were done". 

It's not that hard to change it, and to me it flows better. Yet, that might just be the English style lectures tapping me in the back of the head.

      "The windshield was dipped in Future and then secured in place with CA...." 

 I dipped the windshield in Future and then secured it with CA.

     "Pastels were used to fade the paint and give a dusty appearance...."

Pastels added a faded look to the paint as well as the dusty appearance.

     "Some flat and half-round stock was used to fabricate the seats...."

Flat and half-round stock provided the base for the seats.

First off, if anyone wants to write a report in a different style, try writing in the SECOND person. It can be done (there have even been movies and plays written in the second person) but it isn't easy.

Second, I'd like FSM to adopt running a standardized spec sheet in a box, something like:

- Company Scale Title Kit#
- Sets used
- Paints used
- Materials used
- Tools used
- References
- Notes
- Available from
- Rating

All topics subject to omission when not applicable. This backbone gives the reader something upon which they can count.

When looking at a review, the price is always sought out first. This usually mean that the review will not be read, because that particular kit will not be bought for that price, by this guy!

 Both ways kinda bug me, in their own ways.

dirkpitt77

...What is the deal with this?  Can't you simply say, " I used such-and-such for the cockpit glass...." or "I wanted to use the Aeroscale decals but ended up printing my own."    Am I the only one that finds the 3rd person tone used annoying and a little snobbish?

 

          --Chris

I actually prefer it that way. I'm a graphic designer, and often end up proof-reading articles, ad copy etc. and end up filtering a lot of I-I-I or me-me-me situations. over a paragraph it's not such a big deal, but if you are looking at a whole article with the writer referring to himself I find it tiring. It's just one of those cases of personal preference.

Yeah, Doog is right.  Passive voice.  Not 3rd person.  I so want to take another English course. 

Yeah, smileys!

There's worse things.

Manstein's revenge

What gets under my craw, are the "in-box reviews"...I mean, c'mon... if you are gonna review it, build the freakin' thing...

I know right! Its like, "well, here's the new Me-109 kit.....There's some plastic. Gray plastic. It has wings. Oh, and decals".....No kidding, tell us what we don't know.

Manstein's revenge

What gets under my craw, are the "in-box reviews"...I mean, c'mon... if you are gonna review it, build the freakin' thing...

Eh, I don't mind them per se. It's cool to get a look at what's in the box, the quality of the markings and molds, if anything looks like it'll be a bear.

The problem is the lack of "part 2" pieces, where the kit actually gets built. Or links to those baked back in to the in-box reviews.

What gets under my craw, are the "in-box reviews"...I mean, c'mon... if you are gonna review it, build the freakin' thing...

Doogs is right, it's passive, not third person.  I stand corrected on my previous definition.

These are actually technical articles, not personal letters, so I think writing in the third person tense is entirely appropriate.  I've published many in my day, and that's the way I wrote 'em.

Since this is a personal note, I'm using the first person tense, which is proper for this forum.

So...the writer in me has to point out that that's not third person, it's passive voice (which is also frowned upon...though I think it's fine and even appropriate in certain circumstances).

Third person would be if I were to write "Doogs made the eyebolts by twisting Ultrawire around a piece of 0.3mm wire". THAT would truly be annoying.

The thing that tends to gall me in reviews or how-tos is when a particularly involved technique, or involved part of the build, is just glossed over with "I weathered it" or "the fit was tricky, but manageable". HOW!?!?! Tell us how!

Also have to admit I tend to abandon "reviews" that don't actually talk about how the kit builds. And there tend to be a lot that are 70% history of the hardware, 10% history of the kit, 10% construction, 5% markings, and 5% conclusion.

Yes...