All super glues are not alike, so generalizing isn't very helpful. Personally, I've never had the experience of the glue being harder than the plastic. The medium and thick viscosity glues have a filler, which is usually PMMA (the same acrylic polymer found in Plexiglass). I think this filler is responsible for the hardness complaints--PMMA is a very hard plastic.
So why haven't I had a problem with the stuff being too hard? I use the thin stuff for seam filling--it has no filler. For bigger gaps, I start with putty or strip styrene, but then I top it off with some thin CA. Then I sand it smooth as soon as it dries (the thin stuff dries really fast, so I don't use any kicker).
The thin stuff seems to flow into small nooks and crannies better than the thicker stuff. It also sits down flatter on the surface, which means I don't have to sand as much. I save my medium CA for sticking stuff together.