the doog
Bgrigg:
But think about it this way, you're a 'fair' guitarist 
who could get work at any studio
lol! "Fair", huh, Bill? You'd better be careful with such effusive praise; honestly, you're going to give me a big head, Really--I'm not worthy! lol...
I gotta sat though, I don't get the whole "band" analogy though; it seems to be "reaching" a bit. Maybe I'm just not insightful enough to grasp it...
Bgrigg:
We just want to know if you will fit in the group....
OOPS! I knew the truth would slip out somewhere! That's kinda exactly what U was afraid I'd hear. That;s what I'm talking about when I say that something is :"exclusionary".So....say if someone was a really sincere critic, dedicated to genuinely offering hard-hitting criticism that might offend some egos--would they "fit it"? Or would they be ostracized or even banned? Would that be seen as offensive? I'm just curious as to the latitude given to members?
Honestly, I'm sure that it's all a bunch of great guys--I just don't like the ideology behind it --- as stated by you. 
But I'm not going to lose sleep over it either. 
Sorry about the praise. I'll try to turn it down a bit... 
The band analogy I thought was pretty clear, so maybe my communications skillz are off. No, actually I KNOW they're off. The LEM has no ideology other than being a family friendly forum of modelers. My apologies for causing you to think that they have one. I thought that the band analogy worked pretty good, though almost all analogies "reach".
You mentioned earlier that people can be rehabilitated. Yes, people can learn from their mistakes and learn new ways to deal with people. But would you want your bank to hire a convicted bank robber? After all, he served his time, he's rehabilitated. Why not let him be in control of your money? I wouldn't invite foxes into the hen house, either. No matter how much the fox protests he's rehabilitated. Nature will out.
FSM has an open door, but many rules. Break them hard, or bend them often enough, and you can get banned for a time (koff Manny koff) or maybe life or even longer. I've seen the email that used to go out. One guy I know was banned until 2050! Some people get banned for all the right reasons, and I've seen enough of those on this site to want to never see them again. Either here or someplace else.
The LEM is a closed, but really unlocked, door. We want to make sure you're not a 'Bot wanting to spam us (been there, done that, got the T-Shirt), or a troll who only causes trouble (been there, done that, got the T-Shirt), and there is more than a few out there. As usmc1371 stated, that's what the application is for. It doesn't always work, but it must work pretty well, as there is very little drama at the LEM. There are however, a lot of laughs. There are only a few rules, and in all the time I've been there I know of only ONE circumstance where someone was punted, let back in and then punted permanently. There may have been more, but they've been under my radar. A few members (who are active here and will not be named) packed their tents and left voluntarily, one of which wanted the tent pegs filled in and his membership deleted, rather than merely left to languish. I'm pretty sure that if he re-applied, he would be welcomed, as he was a valued and respected member.
Harsh criticism solely to be harsh will probably get you punted. We've seen that before on this forum, where a member attacks another and the animosity spills over to multiple threads. The LEM would rather avoid that. Honest criticism is appreciated. There is a world of difference between:
"You #$%^ing moron, <fill in blank> are never painted that color, stupid! Any idiot knows that!"
and
"My references show that this particular color was never used for <fill in blank>. They were always painted <fill in blank>. If you are building this for a contest, you should change it, if you hope to win."
Is the LEM an atta boy club? No, it's not, but they can be offered without anyone thinking an atta boy is wrong, either. What's wrong with being supportive of someone trying their hardest, or doing their best?
Is the LEM a critical site? No, it's not, but criticism can be offered in such a way as to avoid conflict (and is), and what is wrong with that?
Do we want people to "fit in"? Yes, we do. Who wants to constantly be in a situation where there is animosity? This is my hobby, I want to enjoy it, not dread it. I'm sure Matt and Aaron want people to "fit in" here, too. Why invite trouble?
Is it perfect? No, it includes me as a member, for crying out loud! That alone makes them imperfect.