Hide the keyboards? The CAG keepsa' playin' that dam Bolero on the old organ e'es got in his cabin ta intertain tha' wenches, wot' keeps me up at nite in th' next cabin wit' ther' catarwallin'.
Bondolog part one of two, cuz y'all dinna got the patience o' whores in Marseilles.
9/25 flew all the way to Rome with Ms. and Miss Bondo, rented a little diesel Focus, good thing th' controls matched the much larger skiff wot I call my Explorer. Drove over to the Adriatic aboot 300 klicks to a town called Acquaviva Collecroce in Campobasso. Seems the grandpa an -ma of Ms. Bondo married, had a kid and emigrated from there in 1904 to Buffalo NY.
Truth to tell, me' hearties, they be descended from Catholic Croatians what fled the Scimitar in Croatia in the 1500's and settled in this litt'l town in Molise, cuz see there weren't no It'ly then, plus two others nearby.
Tough lot they were and are, and still be a'speakin the native tongue, what they be a'callin "Our language" what be medieval Croat. So her Excellent Ms. Bondo rented a big old house fer a week an' there's then 9 (nine!) cousins afrom that Pirate port Buffalo NY wot' come and stay too, plus minor nishnosh from Sicily (husbands).
An excellent time was had by all, couldna walk the streets, me wit' my pegleg affer all, without meetin' relatives, an I reckon me wife an' daughter truly be relations with at least one watch outa four. See here we meet these folks what feed us, only on account of they live next door to where her Grandma's sister lived.
As I live and die boys, it was wonderful. Reckon I was the only bloke in this town not a Ital/Croat.
Bonded well wit' the daughter to what's seen her roots now and is shapin' up, shapely too, to be a true Pirate. Swept a local boy, not worth a cannon ball mind ye, off his spindly little feet, too.
Here we're walkin' away from 'is funeral!
Yer drunken correspondent and LtCmr wot keeps that scurvy rat Aaron pukin' in the bilges, Bondoman. AARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH